Wednesday, October 1, 2008
End of month has come and like usual, mum asking me the same question. Skipping on what has happened that night, both of my parents got to know everything. Hubby came down to settle everything with them.
So yesterday, went to consult my condition at KKH. My face was gloomy whole day as i love this kiddo soo much. So much plannings i've made for him and i don't want to end his life just like that. Its a very cruel thing to kill your own child. Its my life that im standing on, im no more a kid. Its time for me to make decisions on my own and no one can go against it. Checked and confirm, its already 15 weeks old. I was delighted that my tears began to roll down my cheeks when i saw he is there, lying stively. Had another discussion again in the evening over at my place and dad finally giving me the chance to live on my own. The nikah thingin will be approximately in 3 weeks time, and everyone has agreed. Only mum's hatred towards hubby is still burning in her.
Not all couples will end up theirselves divorced. And its not the matter of love that is controlling me. its only that i had enough of my teenage life which does not brought happiness in my life. I want to start a new life in a different way but no one cares till this matter occur. Enjoy is what people say to me. But i had enough. "Enjoy" is the one that will ruin my life. I want to learn to be independent and learn to face major obstacles by myself. Eventhough im different now to certain people's thinking, im still myself. Although im a cheerful or not, im still a sad person that no one knew about me. Whatever people says about me shall fall on my deaf ears, not being selfish but being myself a chance to proof others that i know what i am doing and living in happy life with it.
Looking forward to next check-up.
